There are moments when I ask
Why wasn't I patient enough for you
Why didn't I see it then but see it so crystal now
What is the meaning of this
How am I suppose to decipher this
A combination of the two most influential individuals
You have been freed to find me captured
All of our yesterdays send me
thinking about tomorrows
Why wasn't I patient

It Should Be

I love
I love to love
Love being wanted
Love being put first
Can you pretend if you don't know how
Can you inquire and seek guidance
Because that's the attention I seek

I want my words, my thoughts and tears to make a difference
I want to share conversations that encompass us
I need to forgive myself for not being who you need me to be
And to apologize and ask for forgiveness
I need to write again

I don't doubt you love me
I don't doubt your loyalty
I just don't trust its enough
As it should be
It Should be

I remember me before you
Held an alluring eccentricity
Embodied irresistible abnormalities
I look back and see traces
I want her to return
I want her back

How do I return

Some years ago...

It was at one time, some years ago this was written.
I release this into the universe because, at one point, this was my truth
Some years ago is now long gone, along with what existed then

"Never have I explained who the character "him" is in my Animal Cracker stories. He is a 5' 5" delicious rich deep mocha delight. Cascading his back are his strong flowing locks. He stands tall and mighty in the face of anything but God. He is fierce!"

Sending him many thanks and wishing "him" well


Unsteady Concern

from 2009;
I got worked up Expressed my unsteady concern
"I'm sorry" now The only two words I feel like I've learned
After I realize I've been acting foolish There is no peace tonight
Now that I've decided to speak

No Chance of a Second Round

Seven isn't as lucky as anticipated
The amount of time it takes to move to a substantial place
Even then I knew we were better together than me alone
My battle was plain; my struggle was not being good enough
But so quickly you eased my troubled heart and said I was
Only approving my prospect

This time I tried
Went ahead with hesitation but conquered my doubting mind
Placed in a position of believing again
Trusting in the possibility of what you came to grips with Making sure we were both on the one hundredth page However, subjects were removed from discussions
And just like that, we also became removed
When fear finds a way to nestle into the subconscious

A fearful spirit can't be moved without faith
Compromising is a task without knowing the true reason
Guess I broke your heart too severely to return
Can't force something that isn't supposed to be
Don't want to be that woman
Begging for a man who said I was enough but wasn't

In My Dreams

I love what I haven't seen
Miss a voice I've never heard
Desiring a touch I've never felt
And a kiss I have yet to make
Miss the love letters I haven't received
Miss the scent that you have yet to leave in my clothes
After a hug which I've never felt
But sure enough I know that it's real
Sure to know it when it arrives
Miss you now
As strongly as I did before
You that I cannot see
You that I have yet to meet
You that I always need