#9- i did No such thing

So, we walk in the house from dinner, but I do know that whatever I ate didn't sit well with my stomach. I got home and sat down to settle my stomach murmurs. After about fifteen minutes on the couch, I realized that is wasn't doing a darn thing for me. I figured, my stomach was just full so all of the unsettling would pass. I made my way upstairs to get ready for bed. I get in the hot steamy shower. While I lather up my wash cloth, I bend over wash my toes and brrrr- an invisible smell slips.

me- Ahhh, OMG, I hope he didn't hear that. I pray to God he is down stairs, at least I hope he is. I didn't hear him come upstairs.

Shortly after my worries of him being upstairs, I hear him (thump, thump, thump thump) walking up the stairs. I lit it up with that one invisible smell.

me- Please God, don't let me burn a hole in the bed with all this funk. Hell, I was trying to hurry out the bathroom anyway. I was starting to hurt myself.

I walk out of the bathroom and he's already in bed. While I make my way to the bed, I keep praying that nothing will slip. As the night passed by, I had a dream. In that dream was my biggest fear. The fear being that I ended up passing invisible smells while I was sleeping. This happened a few times. Sometime during the night I ended up waking up to me actually lighting it up. Quietly, I repositioned myself in bed denying the actions that just happened. But sure it enough it was true because the smell rushed to my nose. I tried covering up the smell by bunching up the covers but there was no use. Thank goodness he is sleeping.

(me- gosh, I hope the smell doesn't wake him up)

A few days pass from that evening, he casually mentioned how gross it was for women to release such smells, I started to laugh and said

me- i've never done that around you!
him- o really? that wasn't the case a few nights ago. you were lighting it up.
me- i did no such thing!!!
him- ha, my nose begs to differ!

Talk about being embarrassed!

(animal cracker stories)

Comments

CHD:WCK! said…
i always wondered if when you go to sleep with your stomach gassy and churning and you woke up feeling fine, if that mean's you were lighting it up all night.
i guess it does.

"dutch ovens" are so cool.
Anonymous said…
lol.ahhh, haha.
e.Lisha said…
more room OUT than IN! ;)

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